Lord of the Fries
by V.TheHierophant
Summary: High School AU. Jack and Ralph are somehow friends, but that changes rather frequently.


Jack sits here specifically so he won't be bothered. Not by Roger or Maurice, nor those screeching little-uns, and 'specially not one of the schoolmasters that'll be certain to give him detention for the fag between his fingers, leaking streams of smoke. Jack's at the back of the school, sprawled across stone steps that climb up to a backdoor, chained and padlocked and out of use. Jack tilts his head up, gazes at the gray sky and feeds it another cloud, puffing out his smoky breath. Closing his eyes, he imagines smoke in his bones, sludge black, he's weightless. Lifting up, blowing away-

"Say Merridew!"

Jack's feels himself plummet to the ground, a terrible bloody crash. His entire face souring, Jack opens his eyes and rips the fag from his mouth. A wild moment of search passes before his glare finds the voice's owner. Which is none other than Ralph Shepard, standing at the bottom of the steps like he's come to implore a king on his throne, defensive stance and chin up. King _Jack_. Jack grins, briefly forgetting his anger, and Ralph, taking it as an encouraging sign, grins in return. Ralph climbs the steps until they're on equal footing and sits down beside Jack.

Jack regards him from the corner of his eye. Up close, he notices the damp blonde strands sticking to Ralph's forehead. Ralph pushes his wet fringe back, mouth twisty.

"What's it to you?" Jack asks.

"Been looking everywhere for you. I mean, all over the school and then around the grounds. And finally here I've found you in the most remote little nook you could've chosen."

Jack puffs another breath of smoke. He doesn't need to explain why because if Ralph is smart, he'll already have guessed. That's not even a question anyhow, he _knows _Ralph is quite clever, though not as clever as Jack. Afterall, Jack is always the one awarded for the highest marks. A few times, Piggy's nearly had him beat but that old fatty is no good at extracurriculars like choir and physical ed., and those are Jack's favorites.

"You should be careful," Ralph says. He's staring hatefully at the fag. "If they find out you've been smoking they'll suspend you. Or worse. Why don't you just wait until you're out of school?"

Jack shrugs, examines the fag between his fingers, and in his head he can picture how adult he must look to Ralph. It pleases him on an animal level. Jack tries to play off the same sort of cool indifference as the imaginary version of himself, lifting his chin and extending his arm out.

"Here, you try a puff."

Ralph blinks, hesitating for just a moment. Then he gives into Jack just like he always does and always will. Bringing the fag to his lips, Ralph inhales too deeply and sputters out some scratchy coughs. Jack grabs his shoulder and jostles it a bit.

"You're alright, you're alright," Jack tells him, an ember of worry sparking and immediately flitting out. "Don't be a baby."

Ralph catches his breath and scowls at him, shoving off Jack's hand. The second time he puffs, it's smooth as can be. Jack grins, dizzily proud, and he's not even mad that he himself had needed more than a few times to get it right.

"You should come out here and do this more often."

"With you?" Ralph asks.

"Who else?"

"Nobody," Ralph agrees, gently exhaling his smoke as if he's teasing a candle. "Maybe I will-and then we'll both get suspended. It'll be just my luck."

"It'll be good luck for me," Jack says, smiling. "I won't be the only one in trouble."

Ralph rams him hard in the shoulder. They're both laughing, eyes flashing and breathing shallow, on account of the murky air hovering around. Ralph may be good friends with Piggy, but they're nothing alike at all and secretly, Jack is sure him and Ralph are even better friends, though they don't see each other half as often. But when they're together for these in-between moments, everything is obvious and easy, each shared look of understanding a revelation, like tasting the highest notes in choir.

Ralph's laughter cuts abruptly, the light in his eyes dimming as if he's suddenly remembered something solemn. He wipes his mouth and holds out the fag. Jack takes it with a frown, cold creeping over him because the string that connected them has been cut.

"You stole Piggy's wallet." Ralph tosses the accusation between them, and it lies rotting and stinking in the open, the corpse of a dead animal neither of them wants to touch.

"He deserved it," Jack says quite evenly. He can no longer look Ralph in the eye so he gazes out at the school grounds, his expression neutral.

"Did he?" Ralph's tone ticks up a notch. "And what exactly has he done?"

Flushing, Jack has to think because Piggy irritates him in so many bloody ways that it's difficult to select his most recent justification.

"Well, he-we were in History class and we were learning about the Italian bankers during the Renaissance. And fatty made a comment about how inefficient they were with their investments and even he could do a better job since he's read so many books on economics." Jack rolls his eyes. "So I figured I ought to show him how good with money he really _is_."

He dares a glance at Ralph, and he's predictably fuming, his peachy cheeks starting to turn red.

"I'm not the one who stole it," Jack says quickly. "I only told Roger to do it." _And he did_, Jack thinks with admiration_._

"I don't care how annoying he's being, you can't just steal his wallet. I said you _can't_-"

"So you admit he's annoying!"

"He's my friend, you _know _he's my friend, yet you still act awful to him! Now you give his property back immediately because it doesn't belong to you, and you had no right!" Ralph thrusts his hand out expectantly, but all Jack does is scoff in disgust.

"I'll give you another puff of my fag. That's all." Jack blows smoke at the sky and lolls his head to look at Ralph. "How about it?"

"Jack!"

"Jack! Jack!" Jack sneers.

Ralph snatches his fag and throws it to his feet, stomping on it with the heel of his Oxford. "You'll set things right or else!"

Jack leans back on the step behind them and crosses his arms over his chest. He says, "I'll do what I want and that's that."

Ralph stands with a growl of frustration and marches away, down the steps and around the side of the building. Jack watches after him, practically seeing the steam rising from his blondie head. Jack is frustrated, thinking he'd been rather charitable after Ralph had shouted in his face like that. And if anyone else had crushed his fag, he'd have pummeled their skull in, even Roger's.

With a sigh, Jack digs around in his uniform pocket and pulls out a brown object. Worn leather, fraying edges, it's Piggy's wallet. His next class with Piggy is sixth period so at least he still has a couple of hours to gloat in his successful thievery.


End file.
